Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Naya , naya, naya , teeveeeeeeeeeeeeee.....

If you read the last post here , and more importantly , since then did not undergo some ‘bada hee bhari sadma’ which took away your ‘yaddasht hamesha hamesha ke liye ’ , you would remember that there was something wrong with the sound of my TV at my apartment . I mean , the sound of the TV had gone poof . Star movies dekhne mein tho problem nahi thee , because I did not understand what they were saying anyway , and the himesh videos actually felt better without the voice , but I was missing out on all the hindi movies .
So the owner of my apartment took away the telly to get it repaired. It had been three long days and three long nights without a TV for me when I unlocked the door and walked in after office today. And there it was , a gleaming Philips 52 inch flat TV sitting proudly on the trolley in my living room.( 52 inch hee lag raha hain , kaafi bada hai , Adnan Sami and Arjuna Ranatunga dono saath saath iske andar reh sakte hain ). So it was like , a Bunty who entertained himself by playing saanp seedi had been given a Xbox. It was like a nerd who had last talked to a girl in 1984 had suddenly found a Sridevi sitting on his bed , complete with the ‘haldi wala doodh’ ka glass on the side stool . So all those reading this , please pause for a moment , close your eyes , look up at the stars ( Oye , eyes close karne ke baad stars ko look kaise karoge ?) , and send a little thanks to the owner of my apartment .
And after a long time , something went perfectly fine in my life . After spending almost an year in Kerala , where I ate so much dosa sambar that during the last blood test they found sambar in my veins and the nurses saved it for some flavor during dinner , I have been transferred to Delhi . So all you Delhi guys , lock your girlfriends in refridgerators , for the hottest guy in the country is coming to your town . ( Abbe sacchi , you should have met me when I caught that 103 degree fever in 2003 , I was so , so , hot .) And as I type this , I see the South African team is struggling like a Mahima Chaudhary surrounded by the izzat looting trio of Amrish Puri , Gulshan Grover and Shakti Kapoor . At 98-7 , these guys need to be Shaktiman clones to beat the aussies from here . So considering a Aussie-Lankan final this time around , I will be rooting the Lankans . Australia tho itna door hain , Sri Lanka tho ekdum India ke bajoo mein hain . So I will be hoping our friendly neighbourhood Lankans take away the cup. Apne paas biwi nahi tho kya hua , padosi kee biwi dekh kar hee khush ho lenge na.
Ayyyyyyyyyyyyye Huzoor , pehchana mujhe ? Nahi ? Arre , samjho na , kuch tho samjho na . This is me , Himesh , before I threw away my shaving razor , put on a topi , and decided to show the bilady kuttas of my colony that they are not the only ones who can howl . Ab main bhee aise howl karta hoon ki mohalle ki sabse pyari bitch bhee attract hokar ghar ke saamne aa jati hain .

And one thing I am awaiting as desperately as Engineering students await the kissing scene in a Emran Hashmi movie , is the biggest blockbuster of the year , which is going to blow away the ‘cap’ from the dark and brooding ‘mohabbat ke zakhm’ his heart carries , is Himesh Bhai’s - “Aap Ka Suroor”.
( Abhi ticket book kara le bhai , early bird prize hain ek shaandaar leather topi autographed by Himesh bhai himself )

The country may laugh at him , there are endless jokes about his topi , people imagine everything from a tattoo saying “mera sar takla hain’ to a size 10 footprint under his cap , and his voice sends the colony dogs into a frenzy who fear a new entrant into their territory , but in spite of all this , I am sure a lot of people will go and watch his upcoming movie , even if just to have fun at his cost .And that brings in the moolah . Thus , underneath that tattered white cap which says Banana Republic on the front , I see a very astute and smart brain .

And last week , for the first time in my life , I watched a movie alone – The Namesake .(Haan Haan I know that sounds creepy , but Kerala mein akela rehta hoon tho movie saath jaane ke liye kya Priyanka Chopra kee wax statue lekar jaun ?) . The good part about watching a movie alone is that nobody bothers you.When the heroine and the hero are looking into each others eyes searching for eye infection and slowly moving their lips closer , there is no friend on the next seat who pokes his elbow crushing three of your ribs and whispers “Abbe kasam banana wale kee , kissi aane waleee hain !” and you say "accha ? Mujhe laga badminton khelne wale hain". So when alone , you can watch the ‘kissi’ in silence and wonder why the hero needs to be paid for doing such scenes .

Abbe gudgudi singh , MTV pe Himessss Bhai is crooning “Tere binn dil naiyyo lagda” with so much pain in his eyes , I feel like pushing a couple of pain killer tablets under his eyelids .So bhaiyon aur behanon , abhi main bhee apna dard apne dil mein samet kar log off kar leta hoon .And as a friend told me , I think I will resume replying to comments from this post onwards .But now , it’s time I enjoy the extreme machine my new TV is. Bhagwan mere apartment owner ko Himesh ki movie ki do tickets dilaye.

41 comments:

arpana said...

:)

arpana said...

yo dude, Aussies are gonna win this cup ... keep watching the hattrick they are gonna pull off :D

Anonymous said...

am 3rd .... wow...

Anonymous said...

hey... nice post... God bless ur owner... and nice to see u back in form... keep rockin dude!!!!

Love ya...

Garam Bheja Fry said...

oye maamu singh!!

Australian team ke players Ranjeet ke distant cousins hai lagta hai!!..
jo bhi team dikhti hai uska rape kar dete hai!!
Tainu itta bada TV laaye ho..do stadium aa jaaye jisme..do-do match ek saath..!!

himess kinna cute lag raha hai naa..bilkul cutte ki tarah!! :P

bhot bakwas kar li..tainu bindaas post likhte raho!! :)

Garam Bheja Fry said...

aur ek choti see request hai jii..

Apne blogroll me mera naam "cardamom" se badal kar "Garam bheja fry" kar do..:)

Anonymous said...

GODGiri.

Himensh sud pay you for writin this.

Haritha said...

Yay! I'm in the first 10. Although I've been reading your blog from a long time, this is my first comment. You write really well! Kudos to you!

And lol @ "...and his voice sends the colony dogs into a frenzy who fear a new entrant into their territory..." :D

Cheers!

deepako said...

moi in top 10... hehe. now lemme read the blog ;)

deepako said...

Now I know who bought u the 52 inch Philips color TV!!!
So all those reading this , please pause for a moment , close your eyes , look up at the stars and thank - not munnu's house owner - but Himeshji, for buying him the TV ;)

Chaos said...

beteji aapne to Australia-South Africa match ko ek naya hi rang de diya....koi nahin ab yeh aakashwaani ki gayee hai ki agle world cup tak Sunehari Pepsi peene vaale chaar naujawaan aayenge jo is aatank ko khatam karke jaayenge..Lolzz

baaki himeshji ke baare mein to kya hi kahein......bus topi hi kaafi hai unki, mujhe marathon mein bhagane ke liye......unse milon door.:))

and well all the best to you on your tenure in delhi. hmmm so that means you will be at home i guess, sahi hai. have fun.

Ravish said...

'world cup' movie main koi hero nahi hai...ya ye kahein ki abhi julm hota aa raha hai..pichle barah saalon se....aur 'karan arjun' taiyaar ho rahe hain kahin..is julm ko khatam karne ke lie...tab tak aurtralia ko 'bal poorvak satkar' karne do bholi bhali 'proteas team' ka..

Himesh ji ka mahima mandan apne kafi kar dia hai..aur ab jyada tarif atishayokti hogi...

bahut badi tv ke lie apko badhaiyan....watch it safely...;)

cheers,

rohitkaul said...

good to see you coming back home... and happy once more.

sushant said...

52 inch ka tv kya kerela hi reh jaaega ??

raghav said...

so the next time the FAN is not working u might end up with a bindaas AC huh .. lucky you.. i wish i had similar house owners .. we break a tube we get a fused BULB !!!

anyway hope Sri Lanka wins it .. after all Padosan is better than gharwali *grin*

Anonymous said...

nice post...
good to see to in form...
keep writing...or say rocking.

Ashfaq ullah khan said...

once again !!!!!!!! its lovely.

Nitin said...

yaar haldi wala doodh tab pilaate hai jab kisi ki pitaayi hui ho..aur badan dukh raha ho..Sri Devi ke saath simple doodh se manage kar lena..
:)

Neo said...

52 inch ka color flat screen tv :o :o i really doubt the intentions of your apartment owner :P aaj tak movies mein maine ladki ke maa baap ko 21 inch ka color tv as dahej dete hue dekha hai aur yahan tere apartment owner ne 52 inch tv dey dala, next thing you know he would join you to watch HBO late night thrillers ;) bhag abhi bhag !! apna paak daman bacha kar dilli bhag !! :P

gunj said...

cant stop rotfling at hirmesh bhaai:D
n hw cme u dint notice d lead actress in his movie...dats hansika...d kid straight from pogo tv n koi mil gaya sets landed in hirmeshz baahein to do a lead in a 100 crore movie!!!!
wonder wat did she eat to suddenly transform from a cute kid to a full grown lass!
i mean wen n hw did she skip adolescence??

Loser-in-Love said...

52 inch...mirror ke saamne 25 inch ka to nahin rakah hua....check kar ke bata munnu.

Anonymous said...

bakwas !!

Anonymous said...

On T O P O F T H E W O R L D A S U S U A L : always - everytime - forever - the only - munnu. Great post, great expressions.

Anonymous said...

Haye rabba! naya tv!!U sure u entered the right apartment? :O
If yes,then Bhagwan aisa gharwala[err..owner of house :P ] sabko de!! :D

and Himesh bhai ki jai!
Watching aapka suroor,tht too first day first show,first seat first row was my pehla New Year Resolution! ;)

Congrats for ur transfer..im sure is transfer k peeche north eastern dudez aur dudettez ka bahut bada well manicured haath hai :P !
But I bet Delhi is more HOTTER :( than u!
Goodluck!

-Deepa!

ketki said...

yeh ausseis bhi pata nahi kis chakki ka aata khate hai
kaash indians ko thoda mil jata.........
i too wish lanka wins and gives ausies a good hiding!
waise post achha tha..........

ketki said...

and yes, congrats for ur new tv
enjoy watching adnan sami &arjuna ranatunga together!!!!!!!!!!!1
:)

rohit kaul said...

munnu bhai , agar kabhi time mile to woh jo sidebar mein meri naam ka link hai use change karke rohitkaul.wordpress.com kar dena , plz.

Dreamcatcher said...

Happy to be going back home?

divya said...

like i said... its the 52 inch tv thats keeping u in kerala and not ur boss!me too supporting the lankans. i think in a weird sort of way these aussies make the game boring by winning all the time.

The Soul of Alec Smart said...

Munnu back in form :)

shruthi said...

ha ha ha ha!!mazaa aa gaya..after a tired say at office ur blog is like a stress buster!! and yeah i hope srilanka wins the cup too..

syrals said...

:)) Good one again, glad to see you posting often. Me too looking forward to the Lankans winning.

Have a nice weekend. :)

Ankit said...

Even i m gonna watch that movie.After Watching so called comedy movies like "Bhagam Bhaag" I m sure this wud be much more hillarious

Anonymous said...

you know u r getting stale by the day.

Anshuman said...

your posts just keep getting better!! thanks for this wonderful post :)

Sudhir said...

Congrats on moving back to Delhi buddy. :) Abe 53 inc TV sahi hai yaar.

arshat chaudhary said...

I have been blogging for the last 90 days...
you have been on my blogroll since day1...So I can tell you for sure tht this is the best post you have written in the last 90 days!!!
CHEERS!

Raam Pyari said...

Aaap bhi dilli!!!

waah!!

Anonymous said...

nice post..
and by the way..u shud have a look at the heroine of the movie "aap ka suroor"..in the videos they are airing on teveeee these days...i read someone that she is just 15 years old...featured in a movie as a child artist with hrithink roshan(koi mil gaya) 3 years back..
arey himesh..yeh kya kar rahe ho yaar ?
anyways dude, congrats on the new TV...and start replying to the comments if possible...

Anshul Agrawal said...

Bhai teri Himessshhhhhh... se koi dushmani hai kya ??? tu to uske peeche haath dhoke padh gaya hai ;)

Btw i was thinking ki producer logon ko aisi movies banane ke liye paise kahan se milta hai... if Himesh can be a hero then many of us can be heroes... ha ha ha

aditi said...

damn..!! never saw a blog with so many comments in each post and never saw a blog with sooo many visitors..

the bottomline is - I simply loved your blog.. never laughed so much on reading any content on the World Wide Web.. Count me in one of your regular readers..

keep blogging..and thanks for making us smile and laugh!!