Sunday, February 17, 2008

Seedhi Baat.All Bakwaas.

  • I have ended some 'relations' , if I may use the word in a non scandolous way . I know it's cruel , callous and insensitive in a way , but I need to end what's not working out , atleast for me. It was draining me out and leading down an alley which had an end more dead than Abraham Lincoln is . I know I am being bad by cutting off from it . Makes me a not-so-nice guy . But if you want to save the baby from hepatitis , you need to stick a needle in his bottoms . What other analogy do you expect from a doctor's son. And for the record , I think romantic love is an illusion created by exaggerated hormone play which serves the movie industry and misleads the impressionable youth .
  • Have become incredibly assertive at work . Am shooting off mails which rattle up people the way a rattlesnake in your soup would rattle you . Got into a sharp debate with a brand manager last week .Took apart an office boy who was taking his time checking if my courier had come in. Diving to a deeper level , I am tired of people walking all over me , and I am letting them know I don't like it . And bad news for them , I am liking letting them know .
  • I am transforming into a workaholic . The types who have their cars in the office parking lot when all the other ones have left . Have taken a total of four days off since June 2007 . Monday is no more a scary day . I send out office mails almost every Sunday . Two weeks ago , sent a mail to boss at 1.50 am . He stamped into my cabin next morning and insisted that I get a girlfriend. Not that I want to be on the cover of Time . But I like working .
  • I regret not helping a kid who wanted help with her school farewell speech . I said I will help out , then totally lost track of that . If they had a record for the number of promises broken , my picture would be in the Guiness Book . Front cover . Full color.
  • I zipped past a biker so close yesterday , I think his shirt still got car paint on it. He was high on DVDs of Dhoom series . Was doing that wavy zig zag thing ahead of my car and not letting me pass . I quit honking , switched the gear and zipped right past him , leaving around half an inch between my car and him . And I did it with a smirk . Music does it . Rock on the car radio . And I am a Salman Khan on the road . You better not sleep on the pavement outside your home .
  • I have stopped using my iPod . I like the radio more . More unpredictable . More talkative. And cheaper than an iPod .
  • I love my family more than anything and will stab for them . A female at my office called me a mama's boy when she heard me saying "Will leave office in 10 minutes , ma" on phone . I said "Yeah , I am a mama's boy . I love my mom . And I totally understand it if people from your side of the world eat their mothers , but we dont .We love them all our lives." I actually said that . If you ever needed to understand what a stunned woman looks like , you should have been there .
  • Why does everybody in the conference room laugh when the big boss cracks an intended joke ? I did not find it funny . A funeral is more funny than his joke was . But the guy on my left slapped the table twice and roared . Another one could not stop giggling for a complete forty seconds . I mean , was it in the terms and agreement when they joined ?
  • Some time ago , a friend of mine , who seems to be a male from what I know of him , commented that I am a lovable person . I still have not decided if that is to be classified as a compliment or a gayish attempt at molestation .
  • Nineteen months of corporate world . And I am almost into the habit of thinking in bullets . I think you have an idea of that.

107 comments:

precise.movie.reviews said...

abe tere ki...

kya hua bhai..tum toh ekdum fultoo gusse mein ho..akele apne dimaag ki garmi se dilli ki thand door karoge kya? :)

waise, nice to see you are enjoying ur job. Seems to be hope at the end of the mck-bcg-atk-db-ml-ubs driven process for me !!

Anonymous said...

Nice reply for being "mama's boy".... Family IS the mostbeautiful thing one can have... rest seems quite frustrated... its good and funny to mock at urself .. right!!!... have fun... take care :)

Sherry said...

I claim the bronze for the comment!
Okay, now the comment:

aur kuchh toh pata nahi..about that farewell-ka-speech thing...i'm sure the "kid" u r talking about is okay with everything. I guess she realised u were kinda busy...hota hai.
(do check out this if you can...) :) Have a great week ahead.

Clark Kent said...

nice blog.....i'm kinda new to the boggin' world......pata hi nahi kya likhoon...but ur blog.....i mean great mann!!..hats off...

haan...biker waala incident is wayy true...matlab is it justified ki my junior overtakes my cycle with his bike..?

Marlee said...

Its alright Abhi...every dog has their day.

Amlan Nanda said...

u have let off a lot of steam here.
and in style :)

love it!..

i am waiting for the next one to be posted on a excel worksheet.

:D

Phoenix said...

Oh you really need a break abhi. You've started enjoying being obnoxious and arrogant. Don't pretend being what you're not, it doesn't last. Don't stop saying what you really feel, makes you you (and happier you).
Being a bad boy is not a problem, being cynical and compulsively rude is. Chill mar yar...
I'm glad I dont work in your office :P

Deez said...

strangely sounds deja vu-ish to me.

enjoy :)

Sudipta Chatterjee said...

Shaant gadadhaari bheem shaant!

Waise that reply to the "Mama's boy" thing was ossum. Good job!

Maryum said...

hey.. i havent read teh blog yet.. but if i post this comment on time i can be in top 10 .. so thats why i m posting this comment.. now i will read the blog..tc

Anonymous said...

hey!
nice to see u bak.. do take care..

Maryum said...

thank u for being the silver lining in my very very very cloudy day... it was a bad day and ur blog made it a lil better:D luved teh needle in teh butt part and mama's boy part and the boss's not so funny joke part.. loved the whole thing...

Anonymous said...

Good Going !! There is nothing wrong in breaking off a relationship that is draining you off....phew.. I am only be glad you did that !! I hate to be in such kind of relationship.

Good answers you gave to those people..No more Mister NICE GUY any more !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel nice writing this..
Jaya

Girish (a.k.a) Gary said...

hope all the steam you let off, kind of reduced the built up pressure!!
uncharacteristic blog, but i guess totally understandable under the circumstances.. chill man..

Anonymous said...

So abhi uncle is getting more serious towards life, hats of to mama's boy.....and yes these love stories are simply the way to earn money............waise who said you are LOVEABLE..........thank God he didn't called you gorgeous

Anu said...

too good...keep it up...:-)

Fathima Sagar said...

Wow! I never knew that bullet points meant to have points so sharp and stinging!

Ok, seems like u r angry. But u know what, they say that girls look good while they r angry(though I dont agree to it),
ur post looks more funny in ur anger.

Rithish said...

@Abhi
I am going to repeat what I keep telling people all the time...
The good and bad things in life go in a circle... If things are going bad, and you are at the bottom of the circle; then cheer up.. there are happier days ahead when the circle comes on top. If things are going good, then be pragmatic, and accept it... for the "circle" will take you down again... :o)

AshenGlow said...

I know you dont need an approval here.. but its ok to be rude to the ones who deserve it.. and its purrfectly fine not to let any wretched soul treat you like a dirt bag...
But in the long run, i know it wont be fun reminiscing the way you doled out your wrath on people.. or broke small promises... That just not me rt?.. that was never me....

perhaps an angry soul.. perhaps a hurt one...

Since you have mentioned so much about your ma in your posts, try reading this post sometime... stumbled on this blog long time back... its lovely..

http://avasudeva.blogspot.com/2006/09/ma.html

Anonymous said...

duuuuuuude..... slow down....

take a break... visit the kerala backwaters (ooops... maybe not kerala backwaters, you've had a lot of that - some other nice out of the way place... maybe lakshadweep)...

you really need to take a break man...

by the way, nice retort to the 'mama's boy' line :-)

wont mind if i use that, do you? no copyright fights with me? :-)

vs

Anonymous said...

poles apart from your previous blogs. know you only thru blogs but can say a happy-go-lucky young boy is getting more serious, matured & intense. good or bad.. hmm depends.

Huzefa Mukadam said...

I was hoping you would give at least a cracker of a joke in the post. It was right there in the end. Its interesting to see how your blog has evolved with you.

Quarter Past Seven said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Quarter Past Seven said...

DUDE!

Phew!

This post is like a thappad :P

Gosh!

Shy said...

oh man..ur blog is hilarious...workaholic-living disaster-salman khan on the roads...kudos! as for the mama's boy thing..gr8 reply...hell, i'd chew the guilty guy/girl out if they comment on me being a daddy's girl. family's the best!

Buls said...

Do me a favor... read your first post and read this last one. See the change... and think who do you like better... the previous Abhi or this one.

Anonymous said...

Hi
You don't know me but, I'm an avid reader of your blog. You've always come across as a humble, chilled out and really nice guy. So, I was really surprised to see this post of yours. I just believe that you should never lose yourself as a person, no matter what kind of people you meet.You know just because people around you are cold hearted, cynical and indifferent, doesn't mean you also have to become like them. Don't be disillusioned, that's what the challenge is, to still believe that good things will happen to you and good people will come your way. Hope is the most important thing in life, if you've lost hope, you've lost everything.

IncorrigibleV said...

title se obviously sprite yaad aayi and aapki post se boiling water...
just take care :)

Anonymous said...

Dude, Take a chill pill!
Know you will hate this and especially with your new assertive self.
T'is stage will also be over like everything else.

-Just a ghost from the past ;)
And no I am not any of the gf's you dumped. Infact I am not a girl at all :)

Anonymous said...

delhi ki garmi tere dimaag mein ghush gayi hai.. chill dude

Ravish said...

munnu ke ek baar fir se jai ho..;)

Rocking post..ab ye mat poochna ki kaise..;)

Cheers!!

KP said...

impressive:D..its good to strike back sometime..:P

Anonymous said...

Chanced upon ur blog. Well, many ppl r in the same boat and though everyone says..its ok.. its never okay..and only we can pull ourselves out of it. thats what i figured after waiting for ppl to lend me their shoulder..and using tht doesnt seem to do any help..
nice blog.
my line is "This too shall pass" . it applies quite well everywhere. happy blogging :)
Cheers, divya

Anonymous said...

Hi Abhi,

I have been reading ur blog now for more than a year. Somehow you have changed in last few months, though I am sure u need to be a bit ruthless while working in corporate world but I hope you'd keep in touch with the fun loving and adorable abhi whose posts used to make everyone laugh and love him, the one who had proclaimed on this blog that he doesn't want to be a top honcho but a simple man enjoying simple pleasures of life.
Wish you all the luck n love(yes it does exist)in life.

Unknown said...

reading ur blog for around 3 years,yaad nahi kab comment kiya tha last.really.but i read this often.no tareef.nothing.this is ur life.really.getting into IIM and now 2 exp years of job,but yaar.u still same,i m still quite immature to figure out,what is success,guys goin outside never to return for money,my peers from RECs has b come almost billionare most of them r in US only.i havnt still here...not even in mood to go settle there.even guys who hav flunked severely,are there.chill.i m only son,and youngest at home,to me nothing is precious than my mummy.she is not well actually dats y m writing...hope u donot mind.....write a boook man.soon.only u can!!!!!!!!!!!! m a guy.anupam.

The lost word said...

I went through something similar and I realized that I was becoming what I hated about other people the most!

Being the nice guy counts! Trust me, I learnt it the hard way.

But lovely blog though, I jumped when I saw you had posted again after so long.

Charmed. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Charmed. said...

The simplest of your usages are so enjoyable...the 'wavy zig zag thing' :) wht th guys around u did in the conference room n whoever thot cows were lazie :)
A lot has bin said abt being a 'nice guy' here n othrwise. I believe One shd do wht makes/keeps oneself happy ,(doesnt imply derivin sadistic pleasure :)) but its equally important to luk at oneself, If the frequency of weird instances also becums weird (not for others' sake , bt fr our own good) :)

ketki said...

well...yes, the world is a sea of pretentions.......

i think i can suggest you a remedy
start reading your earlier posts

it works
it worked for me.......

Anonymous said...

are u single?? marry me!

Shanks_P said...

"romantic love is an illusion created by exaggerated hormone play which serves the movie industry and misleads the impressionable youth"

Terrific start ....and bullets means bullets ....

Hats off ....

Kunal Lal said...

Me passing thru same kinda phase..the origins and reasons r a li'l diff...and me not as witty and "haazir jawaab" as u...but that comment is one of the best retorts one can give...and I thought a gud comment is only one that u think of after the encounter is over....

Anonymous said...

A super hug for you!

Keep smiling :-)

Rohit Kaul said...

"Don't sweat the small stuff . And it's all small stuff ."

- Rohit

Charumani said...

Hi! Enjoyed reading your "bullets" and i totally agree with the first one! You have the ability to bring out things (annoying things, may be) nicely. Keep getting it out and feel better!
Charu

Anonymous said...

Great Post... I just love reading whatever you write... I must say you have got gud sense of humour. I won't just this post as right or wrong like other people did but yes I appreciate your natural reaction and I think one must understand the same.

I also did the same to few of my relationships... I appreciate you for such a bold post..

Cheers
Priyanka

Anonymous said...

hey its just a part of growing up--- finding yourself ---but try stayin away from extreme cynicality and bitterness. Take it as advice from somebody who's been there and done that. Regarding relationships, sometimes the toughest call is to know when to end things. take care re:)

Anonymous said...

Girls , He has found someone. Stop Prospecting.

ME.

Alice in Wonderland said...

"And for the record , I think romantic love is an illusion created by exaggerated hormone play which serves the movie industry and misleads the impressionable youth ."

LOL. So true.

Can so relate to the "being assertive at wotk" bit. I go through that every couple of months. Makes me feel like I am in Disneyland. Enjoy, while it lasts.

Anonymous said...

Hey Abhi...
Though I am not fromIIM...(I don't forget any comments) I sill understand this situation...and the requirement of this post!!
Your post made my day!
Tc..
Himani

ishani said...

I loved it..u write great

Padakkam said...

haha. good one.. nice to know there are others in the same boat as i am :)

Anonymous said...

I have read all ur blogs at least three times and this is the first time i have seen such a bitter side of yours. And i wish the old abhinav would be back in the next blog!! :)
Cheer up!!

--Just another fan

ptb said...

the practice of laughing at your boss's jokes starts from the MBA itself when some people develop the irritating notion that laughing at the professor's jokes will count in the class participation marks.

Chronicles Of An Idle Mind said...

Dear Writer,
Have been a big fan of your blogs for a very long time now, and must compliment you on the uniqueness of your style.
Its nice to look at things from such a fresh perspective in today's world of plagarism!

Keep Writing,
Keep growing,
Keep influencing!

Warm Regards,
Dr.Ritu Arora

Kishan said...

just dropped in from somewhere in to your blog.. This post is superb...!!!!

Anonymous said...

Loved this post. ;)
I say u have the power to schmooze.

Anonymous said...

Now this is one humorous yet sensible blog.
You could be the next Chetan Bhagat :D or may be you could write something far - I repeat FAAAAAAAR better than one night @ call centre :P

On a serious note , I really appreciate your writing skill. You have a great vision - many people do - but you know the trick to put your vision into words !
I'm glad I checked out your blog and even read certain posts randomly
Will look forward to read more :)

Happy hour ;)

Namrata ~

Anonymous said...

hi abhi...
thank god u still write.. and u still write loooooooovely.
do visit my blog at times and leave ur words of wisdom

Anonymous said...

visited for the first time.

I like ur blog!

Sanchit said...

yayyy.. awesome post :)

Anonymous said...

ohh..angry young man :-)

i completely agree with broken promises thingie ;-)..

Anonymous said...

Hey Abhi, Enjoyed reading it. U r funny, and smart, and although I don't know u, I do get the 'adorable' vibe. I understand all your thoughts. I want to say that when you really understand what love truly means and fall deep for someone, you will realize that it's not just hormones. True love goes beyond just fulfilling our needs. It is great that you are enjoying your work - keep it up. Work that excites us and challenges us and helps us grow and learn....how many people have that? I used to be bored to death in my last job and would keep looking at the time. It ever really held my interest. It never gave meaning to my life. So good going! Just make sure to keep a balance & not let ur health suffer in the process. Keep your sincerity & innocence and don't stop joking!! :-)
H.

Pujya said...

Interesting!

Anonymous said...

Hey abhi!
great read :) a complete departure from your earlier posts.
your idea on romantic love shows that you have grown more cynical. Maybe ur girlfriend dumped you and you want to say you "ended relations". (and plural??? kitno ko ghumayega be?)
go back, read some of your own writings, and you will realise you have lost yourself in the maze of work and trying to "be someone".

Anonymous said...

hi abhinav!
u seem to me quite a guy like me.I m also a teetotaler,pure vegetarian etc. Even I used to receive such nagging comments on everything since i am living in a hostel.What I did was started laughing at all the criticisms. Instead of hating others be yourself and say politely that "What is wrong in being a mamma's boy? I love my mom.Dont u?" People will automatically start becoming positive to you.Similarly Dont drive fast.If others are doing something you dont like just ignore them and "believe in yourself".Whatever people may say to you,those whom you dont like much better not reply.Why r u getting involved in anger and hatred?This wont lead you anywhere.Instead of asking people that you dont like them..Say-"I have got some work.We will talk sometime later.Any problem?(or hope that is fine with you?)" He would himself stop coming close to you because everytime you reply something which is very true and positive.Even I think same about love as you.If you have problem getting over it consult a psychitrist( I myself did) and things turned up well.I tried everything you are doing but things didnt work well and the main thing was I myself was not liking it.So I decided to read (since i am free enough..m a 4th year student @ IIT) dale Carnegie's books especially "how to enjoy your life and job" and "how to win friends and influence people".Nice read Good practical advices which one should follow.Do read them if you have enough time.Also I would advice you to start "meditation and yoga" to get relief from stress otherwise people would encourage you to start drinking and smoking(which is definitely not the solution). Hope things will turn up on your side.Love your work.Sleep early and wake up early too.Enjoy your life.Even i am still trying to do all things and bring positivism in my life.Hope everything turns up well.One thing more ..I m your regular reader.All the blogs you have written till date are awesome ones.BBYe Take care...

She said...

Assertive at work: check
Workaholic: check
No nonsense driver: check
Radio over the Ipod: check
Family child: check
Thinking in bullets: check
Pissed as hell: check
Able to focus anger: check
Still smiling coz the world aint that bad: check.

akshara said...

Lovely post - especially cos I'm sitting in office and reading it

She said...

Thanks for dropping in. Crappy day so far. Read the post again. Am looking to kill now. Maybe I could run a couple of those bikers over.

Anonymous said...

Nice..............

Anonymous said...

Nice..............

Anonymous said...

hey abhi....gr8 blog..im new to this whole blogging thingy bit i must say ur blog makes for some amazing reading...and the best part is tat your blog is not one of those regular pretentious high brow types(considering tat you're an iim pass out..yeah yeah..the world is full of stereotypes:))...i particulaly liked the family bit from your last post...i loved all your posts so far but i must say der has been a marked shift in ur style...i guess its just a phase tat wil pass...but ur last post seemed to be overflowing with cynicism...comin from you,didnt look very good...i know its cool to be 'oh so cynical' these days,but i cant seem to think of anything less cool(having emerged out of such a phase just recently,i speak from experience) ur earlier posts seemed so much more real and forthright...hope you get back to ur wutty self real soon...anyway,you r definitely very articulate in expressing all your views...its like you just take the righr words outt peoples' mouths(ugh..tat line doest sound too good,i know)...i've just started blogging but cant seem to open up as effortlessly as you do...but u sure make it look easy...anyway it was great reading ur blog...keep up the amazing work...cheers
p.s:add me to ur impressive list of fans:)

Anonymous said...

hey abhi....gr8 blog..im new to this whole blogging thingy but i must say ur blog makes for some amazing reading...and the best part is tat your blog is not one of those regular pretentious high brow types(considering tat you're an iim pass out..yeah yeah..the world is full of stereotypes:))...i particulaly liked the family bit from your last post...i loved all your posts so far but i must say der has been a marked shift in ur style...i guess its just a phase tat wil pass...but ur last post seemed to be overflowing with cynicism...comin from you,didnt look very good...i know its cool to be 'oh so cynical' these days,but i cant seem to think of anything less cool(having emerged out of such a phase just recently,i speak from experience) ur earlier posts seemed so much more real and forthright...hope you get back to ur witty light hearted self real soon...anyway,you r definitely very articulate in expressing all your views...its like you just take the right words outta peoples' mouths(ugh..tat line doest sound too good,i know)...i've just started blogging but cant seem to open up as effortlessly as you do...but u sure make it look easy...anyway it was great reading ur blog...keep up the amazing work...cheers
p.s:add me to ur impressive list of fans:)

11:52 PM

Manohar said...

write more blogs.. You will feel better.. seriously..

Anonymous said...

http://preetha-lifesbeautiful.blogspot.com/

This one is for all of us :-)

~Mishti :-)

somebody said...

whoa what happened to u?????!!!!

u actuaally said tht thing abt ur eating ur motherss to that bechari shocked gal...!
koi baat nahiii... gussaaa nikallnaa bhi achaa hota haii! i see u;ve posted something neww ..good...

Anonymous said...

bete di jaan!!!!!!!!
i m actually..i m actually feeling good....thanks a lot!

dont try to understand what i have written..bt i m feeling good!

Anonymous said...

Dude.. All aside, never ever do the zipping past a biker again... please... even if the biker is a total a****le as in this case. Life is too precious to be lost in an accident.

Anonymous said...

somehow i knw your 1st point made for me only--

can u pls call me

Anonymous said...

Your last point says it all..

Jass said...

"Yeah , I am a mama's boy . I love my mom . And I totally understand it if people from your side of the world eat their mothers , but we dont .We love them all our lives"

ROTFL!!

I like bulleted thinking , it sounds clear , and it doesnt matter what the last point was about, a new bullet is a new thought ;)

pm said...

awesome post! as always!

Experimenter said...

Nice job, and well written.

Check this up... your post reminded me of it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5BQiLkMJzY

Anonymous said...

All Bakwaas Information like this for you guys!
Only ay hhtp://www.allbakwaas.info

Unknown said...

i loved your blog:)

Writer's Corner said...

• Good for u
• Make sure you walk on everyone who u don’t like too
• screw your boss [well not literally]
• That’s bad. You suck
• What? You didn’t hit him?
• Radio’s better..unpredictable
• Stab em all
• Next time laugh when he says something serious :)
• That’s definitely a gay…especially if he likes a grouch like u
• Yep…so am I :(

Dev said...

Mast likha hai ... lot of patience to write so much :D

DebsWandering said...

Outstanding!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Nice post
and unlike many comments here, i dont think ur post is either a triggered bullent or out of frustration. infact, i very much identify with ur thoughts....work place sometimes, especially after a particular period of time becomes our second home.
and coming to relationship part - one's gotta end it, when it becomes too much....and i know, how badly u get blamed for it, though most of the blamers know that fault is not with us! and it's i guess more than normal to drive past the a**h**** who disturb the traffic....
and finally, congratulations for having me as a fan of ur blogs :)

Urvi said...

The last one was cool...

Anonymous said...

I don't really know you, actually I don't know you at all. We are strangers, I was searching something related to Bakwaas on google and I came across this and it could not stop myself from commenting. The only thing I can say is " I felt like I am reading my mind, my thoughts, my feelings..."; It brought a smile on my face :-). Good work. Take care.

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