Sunday, June 12, 2005

Of sunny and Idli

I pasted newspapers on the window glasses this morning.Keeps the sun out.Its so hot and real humid here at Calcutta , slap the air and half a glass of water falls down.So the papers keep the sun out. And I just have to look at the window to know that Essar has lined up 1.5 bn $ for its telecom plan and to know that B.C.Jain Jewellers at Camac Street , Kolkata have a ensemble of dazzling solitaires at discounted rates now.

I have watched some three movies over the last two days.LA confidential , Van Wilder , Page 3.There is something very fine about watching movies on a computer rather than on a Television.

Arjun , the "imaandaar" son of an ultra "imaandaar" school teacher master Dinanath , has testified against Saleem Pistol ,who has risen from a rag picker to become a terrifying underworld baddy.To avenge the testification , Kareem Rifle , who is the big brother of Saleem Pistol , picks up his sword and takes off after Arjun. Arjun is standing in the queue at the local mother dairy to buy a litre of double toned milk.Kareem Rifle spots Arjun and charges towards him. Arjun spots Kareem Rifle running towards himself with a sword in hand.He panics , pees in his shorts, collects his milk polypacks and then runs.Kareem Rifle is after him.both running on a busy mumbai street.Panting.Sweating.The distance is closing between them.Kareem Rifle is too angry and charged up to let Arjun go and make a milk shake with that milk.Running over parked cars.vegetable carts.Arjun is tiring.Kareem Rifle is almost there.He makes a final lunge , floors Arjun, gets on him , yells horribly ,and pulls back his sword to chop down Arjun.

A baseball Cap wearing Sunny Deol tells me he wears "Jo pehne So comfortable" brand innerwear all the time because its 100% cotton and makes him feel like hes wearing nothing.Thats what commercial breaks do to you.When the sword on Arjun was about to come down and I was trembling with the anticipation of spurting blood and double toned milk , I suddenly have to acknowledge the underwear Sunny Deol wears.Thats the good part about watching movies on a computer rather than television.

No commercial breaks.How I love being concise.

But Sunny Deol and his "i feel nude" innerwear notwithstanding , I am loving this term. We can actually choose electives and study what we like.Thats a very good thing.Makes this term much more interesting.

And I have been reading a lot about Rapes these days.Its bad.But every male is being branded a part time rapist.See , not all of the males have boiling hormones.If I try to help a lady struggling with her shopping bags in a mall , she thinks my sole motive of existence is to impress her,and ask for her telephone number and address, and to turn up at her home on some rainy night and then to end up sleeping with all the females in her household.I mean , I know women have been living under a cloud of threat.But what do I do , wear a "I-wont-rape-you" tee shirt ?Anyways , what me worry.But if anyone thinks every male have this desire impress females , I am not a male according to his theory.

Some guys have better things to do than to think of girls .So relax ladies .Atleast I dont care.

A friend who reads my blog commented im beginning to sound like a misanthropist these days.Oh its perfectly fine.You dont need to drown youself in yourbath mug for not knowing the meaning of the word.Its one who hates the entire mankind.Thats news for me.I dont plan to throw acid on girls or to trip old men or to plug chewing gums onto the backsides of innocent citizens.But yeah , I am beginning to feel very comfortable with myself these days.Like I have no need to be a part of any group.I am becoming more and more of myself with each passing day.I am shedding all the pretensions and masks each of subconsciusly wear.Its like I need no one as an emotional support or to complete me.I am very fine with my solitude.Just give me some music and I can spend decades in my room alone.Maybe that makes me a little socially withdrawn.But I have two goals in life.One is to see Ashwarya Rai tie a rakhi on Vivek Oberoi's wrist and walk off into the sunset with me.The other is to lead a peaceful life where I dont have to be someone I am not. And just being myself brings me closer to the latter aim.

Someone just put on this south indian song at pretty ear-drum challenging decibel levels here.That reminds me , a lot of South Indian students have moved into the rooms around me.We call them "Idlis" here at IIM C. Nothing offensive.We are all Indians. Just that we call them "Idlis".All in good fun.And they are free to call us North Indians "Mattar paneer" or "Bread Pakoda" or anything. So I don't want any "Aiyyo , I swear on Rajnikanth Saaar , I weel keel you machaaan !" kind of comments now. But this sudden cultural exposure has been good for me.Suddenly I am one of the fairer guys on my hostel wing.

Anyways , I have to watch "Zeher " now. And guess what , without any Sunny Deols and "Jo pehne so comfortable" underwears.

On the Jukebox : Ek Na Ek Din - Lucky Ali

23 comments:

Miss Sea said...

hehehe. I will take that paragraph on rapes as a joke :P

Studying what interests u is always great. Learn all the Ps of marketing well :)

rohit kaul said...

I will prefer aish to kick oberoi's @$$ and then walk off with moi...pretty violent I am :D

Zeher..hmm..ofcourse no scope for undies et al there..u know y ;) ;)..errr...pretty low budget movie it is :D

your posts always have some elemnent related to femme fatale...aisa kyaa hai bhai??
OK i take my words back....U r not misanthropist...but a comicothropist....guess the meaning :D :D :D

adios
rohit

Archana said...

Idlis?? How mean you..you...hmm..you.....'mudde with hagalkayi palya'. Thats the worst I can think of now. Ash is too old for you, I think you'll be happy with Sneha Ullal ;D

Arch Storm said...

hehehe...sunny deols ads make me laugh! worse are the Govinda ones!

I said...

u know u will look ash's younger brother...so find someone of ur age he he ;)

When ever i read your posts i cant stop laughing...but u know it looks awkward laughing out here when everyone else around me is seriously working..so i smile and smile...and ppl wonder whats wrong with me...kabhi to kuch serious likha kar munnu ;)


Shipra

priya said...

helllooo idli speaking saar.. me idli too :-)

Abhi said...

@ TT :Good girl.thats the spirit.waise i was serious this time :/.n yea i know the four Ps : people , price , product ....n...nn...

@RK:ash ko paane se pehle tujhe meri laash ke upar se guzarna hoga saambha.

@Archana: I told you.All in good fun. n even then u call me "mudde with hagalkayi palya !!! ".wait till i find a tamil-hindi dictionary.

@arch storm : o yea.govinda is another advertising disaster.hav u seen the sona chandi ad where hes dressed as an army guy.man.u shud see that.

@Priya: I hope there aint any chance of northies-southies riots due to this.n idli is a cute word infact.hope u find ur saambhar.
@Shipra : Why is everybdy wanting a breakup between me n ash ? n waise hi life mein itne gham hai ,fir kyun serious banoo , waise hi museebatain kam hain ?

jammer said...

well abhinav i have been reading ur blogs of lately and i think that u should start writing a book on human philosphy :) and i find ur blogs too humorous...cant resist laughing. keep going man

panic said...

I hate smoking and i smoke.
I hate drinking and i drink.
I hate to do a multitudinous motley of things.....end up doing all those.
I hate to read this blog.....alas, I read(read red) it.:-)

Archana said...

Vagabond,
Try with a KANNADA dictionary......it would be more helpful than a Tamil Dictionary :)) :)) Kannada and Tamil are way too different :D

liquid sunshine said...

hey vagabond.tx for dropping by.lmao@idlis

Miss Sea said...

it's price, product, place, promotion i think ..damn..must go revise :(

Anonymous said...

hehe..... firstly spell ASH correctly beta..

Abhi said...

Thanx buddy.human philosophy.I am the next freud !

@Panic : you smoke n drink n all that ? you need to get ur habits straight man.;)

@Archana : I knew it was kannada.just kinda slipped of my mind.mudde with hagalkayi panya.ill get that.


@Liquid sunshine : oh it was a pleasure.u write very well.

@TT : ab kuch padogi bhi ya batein hi karti rahogi ?

@Anon : wats is a name.Ashwarya ho ya Aishwarya.waise thanx fr pointing out .( sheepish smile)

Twilight Fairy said...

Idli guys DO call northies as "mattar paneer" :).. n they crib about paneer being the only "veg" thing up north in all restaurants..

BTW ur aishwarya rai goal may never see the light of day :)

Anonymous said...

i am not a blogger nor do i have my own web page but cudn't resist myself from commenting on ur blog Abhinav especially what u wrote about rape incidences. its right that all men are not rapist, but being a law student and a girl i can definitely say this that these people are not human also they are mentally ill people needing seclusion from society. they should be sent to Kala pani to forests of Amazon or to Antartica where they can't see any human being.

Abhi said...

@twilight fairy : Lets see dost.Keep watching the Movie channels.Ill be there some day with aish.

@anon : yeah buddy.I fully agree.Thats the worst kind of crime.I am sorry if i sounded like i was supporting it.but hey , atleast give them a TV with cartoon network at the amazons , a lil bit of humanity is in place.

divya said...

i`ve been reading ur blogs for sometime now.. everytime i tried leaving a comment i was asked to sign up and i was too lazy to do it. never occured to me that i could hit on the other options!! and as for ur dreams of walking into the horizon, with miss rai in tow ,u`ll have to stop calling south indians as idlis... rai`s a south indian remember... oh with all this rambling i have forgotten my very purpose oF leaving this comment, i just wanted to say that U WRITE WELL

Vaibhav said...

Blogrolled you...

Keep the funny flowing and remember to get me a job!

ll said...

pp

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