Sunday, June 05, 2005

The two golden hearts

Big tears.Not the drizzly ones which just make your cheeks wet below the eyes.But big tears which travelled along the cheeks in clearly defined streams , left the surface , dropped straight down and plopped down on the clean sparkling airport floor.My parent's tears.My sister's tears.Me too.But not before my parents and sister.I held the tears before I could turn down the security check counter where I was out of my family's view.I know I am being a little too sissy about my stay at home ending.But thats the way I am.I cry easily.

I left Delhi this morning and a couple of hours later ,landed safely , here at IIM calcutta to start upon my second and final year of M.B.A.

I have set up the room . The clothes have been shoved in the almirah.The curtains have been put up.The computer has been set up.And I have got this table fan which whirrs and throws pretty good air.Its just so good to have it in this stuffy heat of Calcutta.

But I'm missing my family now.Would be fine once the classes start from tommorrow.But not now. Really want to sneak into the kitchen at my home right now , and scare my mom by shouting in her ear.And then she would turn and say "munnu ! tu kisi din heart attack dilwayega mujhko! ".She always says this when I do such stupidities.What would my Dad be doing right now ? Maybe he would be reading the newspaper.I always want to read the newspapar when hez reading it.I pull the newspaper and he pulls it back.Then ma comes in to settle the issue and we divide the newspaper pages.Im happy with the sports page usually.And then my sister would come in and call me a lazy bum or something to that effect.I would call her a stupid girl and then she would say that getting into IIM has gone to my head.I was surprised to see her cry at the airport this morning.She rarely cries without my hitting her.

Why do I have to be away from them.Oh yea,this career's sake.So that I earn a lot of money and make them more comfortable and proud of their munnu.I understand.My being here is the best thing for our family.But for those of you who are with their parents , dont let the moment go unrespected and unrelished.Maybe its only when we move apart that we realise the value of being together.

A Family is the most natural blessing.Maybe we have become so used to a ma working in the kitchen , to a dad reading the newspaper , to a sister teasing us that we don't notice them anymore , and search outside for someone special, something special .But nothing can ever come close to the love your parents give you. I look at my right hand. This hand has been through quite a lot.This hand slapped a guy when I was in class 6 ,caressed a glittering trophy when I was adjudged the best student in class 11 , high fived other hands when we joked at the college hostel.

But still the most natural and loving thing this hand must have done is to curl around my ma's finger.

The love in a mother's heart.That cannot be found in any investment bank , in any dollar note , in any degree .We guys search the world for trophies and medals.But the best and most natural form of joy you can get is in feeling the unconditional love your parents can give you.You will always have to return to your parents to see that glitter of true love and caring in their eyes.You may sleep on huge beds with lavish furnishings in an air conditioned room.But the timeless feeling of relaxation , without any work or tasks to worry about , is when I place my head in ma's lap and she strokes my hair lightly.

Neend kahin bhi aa sakti hai , par araam to ma ki god mein hi milta hain.

Have you ever talked to your ma about the moment you took your first step ? The twinkle in her eyes , the soft excitement in her voice , the slight smile on her lips , recounting that moment after all these years is something else.Different that any other joy.Its like her soul is
completely immersed in the unbridled joy of the moment when you pressed your soft and tiny foot against the earth on your own , for the first time.

So just remember that somewhere , those two people , are still wishing for your happiness with all their hearts , and still waiting to stroke your hair with their now frailer hands , and still feeling joy at every smile of yours.

People , you may have created empires , businesses , nations but those two people have created life. They have created you .

Life may be about achieving huge targets , getting into IIMs , getting a job in New York , buying fast cars . But life is also about watching your ma fold clothes , about sneaking behind her and surprising her,about pulling your sister's ponytail , about making your family laugh by acting stupid , about helping dad in cleaning the car , about mom calling me and asking me not to run down the hostel stairs too fast.

Life is not about a few big moments , but a million small ones.

So please go out , win the world , be a famous man , but please don't ever forget to care for the two golden hearts of your ma and dad back home, beating just for you.

16 comments:

karthika said...

this is a very emotional post abhi,u have made me cry reading this post..but after all its worth it,anything for my parents.

today am the first one to comment before Rohit Kaul..Hippie..!!!!!!!!

kpowerinfinity said...

great post !!!! was myself reminded of the time when my parents came to drop me off to kgp 3 years ago !!! for the next few weeks, i just couldnt imagine i was living taht life ...

so true, parents are the only people who really care about u ... and the only way they end their conversation is with "apna khayal rakhna" !

rohit kaul said...

If I say its a gr8 post I'll be depreciating the worth of the post so I wont do tht.Wateva u hav written I m sure cant be qualified using ne adjective present in Oxford's dictionary.It is one of the purest outburst of emotions I hav ever seen....
waise its not fair...u wrote this post wen I hav only a few weeks left in DLI.....mere ko bhi senti kar diya....newys.....I m happy to b going to L....and thts wat mine or nebody else's parents want...tht V shud b happy....

adios
rohit

Cherubin said...

My eyes got misty while reading this post bro...reminded me of all the time I spent away from home at school...a good six years and again I'll be leaving this year....

SonnyBoy said...

dude! that was one emotional and heart wrenching post i say...
Quite a change after those comic masterpieces...
Good luck for the final yr...

Miss Sea said...

Awesome Post.

What depresses me is the fact that our parents love us sooo much and we can never love them the same way. For instance, a father/mother would never write such a post, a son/daughter would. We need to remind ourselves that they are the ones who matter. For them it's a given fact that we r the most important people in the world. We take their love for granted :(

btw, "She rarely cries without my hitting her."...LOL! :)

panic said...

unconditional love...that describes it all...:-)

Abhi said...

@Karthika : cmon.my grammar aint that bad that u cried !

@KP :yea buddy.apna khayal rakhna.

@RK : oye going to IIM L is the best thing u hav dun fr ur parents.uve made em proud buddy.n u know wat , i cant access ur blog frm IIM C , some problem it seems:(

@Angel : u pesky top ranker:p.hey in a way staying away sharpens the love sister:)

@sonnyboy : tnx man.hows ur training going ?

@TT : wow.is this page loading all rite ? TT comments n nothing attacking ?;p jus kidding.good to know u aint angry after readin sumthing at my blog.

@Panic : right.n thats the exact beauty of it all.not one condition.no expectations.

shantanu said...

very true dude..i realized their importance only when i left home last yr for my job and crave for their love very minute now...

Debprotim said...

Highly emotional post!
i realised how attached i was to my parents when they were goign away in a rickshaw frm the kgp campus 4 yrs ago. this was the first time their only child was going to stay alone.I still feel depressed when the time comes to leave home after a vacation.Sometimes i feel it is better to take up a job in my homecity so tht i can be with my parents.It might not be a gr8 job, but so wht, i can stay with family.

Varun said...

Hi, Just got to know about ur blog from a friend of mine........Ur thoughts are certainly enlightning.....as far as ur this post goes I can only say that God could'nt be Omnipresent so he created mother......nd it is so true for all the mothers of the world.

Anonymous said...

Everybody in our age feels that way for parents,we realize our immense respect and love for them when we leave our homes for jobs or studies. What is important is tht the feelings remain intact through our paths in life,when we slog at job, get married and when our parents are fragile and dependent on us.

panic said...

echo anonymous..:-)

invincible said...

i like ur posts especially abt the indian wedding one..soo true man..absofuckinglutely..:)like ur writing style as well its simple n straight from the heart ..keep it flowing..

Anonymous said...

Hey Abhi,
This is very emotional.
Yes, nothing is much worthful, joyful than our parents LOVE. Just few days i was emotionally down, I was in depression. Doctor asked me to cal my parents. Their care and Love made me come back to LIFE.

Neha said...

feelings put very nicely...made me remember the times when i yell at my mom n justify it by saying "apno pe nahi chillau to kispe?",...shit, i hate myself when i do such stuff (mind, im a good child of my parents n dont do this frequently ;-))...but yes, i do take my parents for granted in a way..and im actually terrified of the fact that my mom loves me so unconditionally.